Settling out of court
This week is on Matthew 5:21-26:
These are some pretty wild verses. Everyone teaches on the first paragraph, but not too many people try to find meaning in the second two. They seem to fly in the face of God's grace for us. We all know that we need to forgive people, because it will cost us, but does other people's unforgiveness of us cost us something too?
Forgiveness is important. Jesus died so that our sins can be forgiven. He paid the cost so that we could be together without grudge or debt. We're supposed to do as he did, to represent him. When you forgive someone, you set them free to change. You're not declaring anymore that they're a murderer, or an adulterer, or a pedophile, or a thief, unfaithful, selfish, evil, etc. You're acting in love, saying that you'd like them to have every chance to succeed in eternity that they would have if they'd never done that awful thing. You're not waiting for the cops to show up and haul them away for crimes they're no longer committing. You're not out on the street pointing your finger and giving them the evil eye.
But what about the other way around? How is it that it is more important to God that we square things away with those we hurt than it is that we serve him? If our brother, sister, or fellow Christian has something against us, and we know it, are we really supposed to stop in the midst of an act of worship and go to them, begging to settle up? What about the parable about your adversary taking you to court, where their unforgiveness of you makes you subject to judgment? How can that be, when we're taught that forgiveness is wholly the responsibility of the person wronged? Why isn't the judge telling the accuser "Well, you need to forgive them, so the prison and punishment are for you instead!"
I think the clue lies in Jesus talking about murder. If someone who doesn't forgive, who stays angry and thinks "you fool," is in danger of hell, and it's your actions that put them in that mental state, and you don't care, isn't that kind of like murder itself? If you fed someone a meal, and there turned out to be poison in it, and the person was dying because of what they swallowed, wouldn't you try to help them find the antidote when you found out? Or would you just be like "Well, you just need to deal with it. It's not my problem." What you've done is killing them! Your friend, your brother, is dying spiritually, and you're just going to go on worshiping, playing church, like nothing is wrong? That's every bit as bad as unforgiveness.
It is hard to have someone you care about be angry at you. Even people you don't care about can weigh on you, when they've got a grudge against you. Don't harden your heart against them. Don't ignore them and hope they'll move on. I've seen it happen to too many people. They soon become entrenched in unforgiveness of those people who won't forgive them. They look at Jesus' gift of forgiveness to them, and they look at it as their right, one which is owed to them by all living things. It's not a right, it's charity because you can't afford the full cost! They want grace without cost, forgiveness for sins that mean nothing to them. Hating someone for not forgiving you is like beating a kid for crying. Could it possibly help them? Is it an act of love, or just your indignation?
In an ideal world everyone would forgive freely. In an ideal world, nobody would sin! We don't live in that ideal world. We have to meet people where they are. If the act of forgiveness is too difficult for someone to do, and there's something within your power you can do to help make it possible for them, isn't that worth the cost of their soul? Isn't that price less than what you'd have to pay in a world without grace? If they were caught in something less severe, like a drug addiction, or an abusive relationship, wouldn't you pay some price to see them free of it? Is it too much even to ask them "What would it take?" For Jesus, on our behalf, it was his life. Is it going to cost you that much? You'll probably find it's much less.
When Jesus called Zacchaeus the tax collector, Zacchaeus went to the people he'd hurt and asked them to tell him what it would take for him to make his debt right. (Luke 19:2-10) He offered to pay four times the money he'd embezzled from them, just to gain their forgiveness. He didn't just turn his back on the people. He didn't just hide behind Jesus and yell at the people for dredging up the past by calling him a sinner. He made an effort to buy the people's forgiveness, because he knew it was important. Jesus didn't argue with him or accuse him of living under the law. Jesus gave his blessing.
If you wouldn't help a dying man, is your love worth anything? If you won't even taste the death Jesus suffered to buy our forgiveness, are you really able to eat his flesh and drink his blood? It is so much better to settle out of court and buy not only your own forgiveness and peace, but the soul of your friend. Do you really want to stand up at the last judgment, see this person who was once your friend get punished, and have Jesus ask you why you didn't care? What could you possibly tell him? Ouch! Isn't it just easier to take care of it now?
“You have heard that it was said to the people long ago, ‘You shall not murder, and anyone who murders will be subject to judgment.’ But I tell you that anyone who is angry with a brother or sister will be subject to judgment. Again, anyone who says to a brother or sister, ‘Raca,’ is answerable to the Sanhedrin. And anyone who says, ‘You fool!’ will be in danger of the fire of hell.
“Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to that person; then come and offer your gift.
“Settle matters quickly with your adversary who is taking you to court. Do it while you are still together on the way, or your adversary may hand you over to the judge, and the judge may hand you over to the officer, and you may be thrown into prison. Truly I tell you, you will not get out until you have paid the last penny.
These are some pretty wild verses. Everyone teaches on the first paragraph, but not too many people try to find meaning in the second two. They seem to fly in the face of God's grace for us. We all know that we need to forgive people, because it will cost us, but does other people's unforgiveness of us cost us something too?
Forgiveness is important. Jesus died so that our sins can be forgiven. He paid the cost so that we could be together without grudge or debt. We're supposed to do as he did, to represent him. When you forgive someone, you set them free to change. You're not declaring anymore that they're a murderer, or an adulterer, or a pedophile, or a thief, unfaithful, selfish, evil, etc. You're acting in love, saying that you'd like them to have every chance to succeed in eternity that they would have if they'd never done that awful thing. You're not waiting for the cops to show up and haul them away for crimes they're no longer committing. You're not out on the street pointing your finger and giving them the evil eye.
But what about the other way around? How is it that it is more important to God that we square things away with those we hurt than it is that we serve him? If our brother, sister, or fellow Christian has something against us, and we know it, are we really supposed to stop in the midst of an act of worship and go to them, begging to settle up? What about the parable about your adversary taking you to court, where their unforgiveness of you makes you subject to judgment? How can that be, when we're taught that forgiveness is wholly the responsibility of the person wronged? Why isn't the judge telling the accuser "Well, you need to forgive them, so the prison and punishment are for you instead!"
I think the clue lies in Jesus talking about murder. If someone who doesn't forgive, who stays angry and thinks "you fool," is in danger of hell, and it's your actions that put them in that mental state, and you don't care, isn't that kind of like murder itself? If you fed someone a meal, and there turned out to be poison in it, and the person was dying because of what they swallowed, wouldn't you try to help them find the antidote when you found out? Or would you just be like "Well, you just need to deal with it. It's not my problem." What you've done is killing them! Your friend, your brother, is dying spiritually, and you're just going to go on worshiping, playing church, like nothing is wrong? That's every bit as bad as unforgiveness.
It is hard to have someone you care about be angry at you. Even people you don't care about can weigh on you, when they've got a grudge against you. Don't harden your heart against them. Don't ignore them and hope they'll move on. I've seen it happen to too many people. They soon become entrenched in unforgiveness of those people who won't forgive them. They look at Jesus' gift of forgiveness to them, and they look at it as their right, one which is owed to them by all living things. It's not a right, it's charity because you can't afford the full cost! They want grace without cost, forgiveness for sins that mean nothing to them. Hating someone for not forgiving you is like beating a kid for crying. Could it possibly help them? Is it an act of love, or just your indignation?
In an ideal world everyone would forgive freely. In an ideal world, nobody would sin! We don't live in that ideal world. We have to meet people where they are. If the act of forgiveness is too difficult for someone to do, and there's something within your power you can do to help make it possible for them, isn't that worth the cost of their soul? Isn't that price less than what you'd have to pay in a world without grace? If they were caught in something less severe, like a drug addiction, or an abusive relationship, wouldn't you pay some price to see them free of it? Is it too much even to ask them "What would it take?" For Jesus, on our behalf, it was his life. Is it going to cost you that much? You'll probably find it's much less.
When Jesus called Zacchaeus the tax collector, Zacchaeus went to the people he'd hurt and asked them to tell him what it would take for him to make his debt right. (Luke 19:2-10) He offered to pay four times the money he'd embezzled from them, just to gain their forgiveness. He didn't just turn his back on the people. He didn't just hide behind Jesus and yell at the people for dredging up the past by calling him a sinner. He made an effort to buy the people's forgiveness, because he knew it was important. Jesus didn't argue with him or accuse him of living under the law. Jesus gave his blessing.
If you wouldn't help a dying man, is your love worth anything? If you won't even taste the death Jesus suffered to buy our forgiveness, are you really able to eat his flesh and drink his blood? It is so much better to settle out of court and buy not only your own forgiveness and peace, but the soul of your friend. Do you really want to stand up at the last judgment, see this person who was once your friend get punished, and have Jesus ask you why you didn't care? What could you possibly tell him? Ouch! Isn't it just easier to take care of it now?
Two sided forgiveness--what a concept!
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