Gentle gentle
This is on Ephesians 4:29-32:
These verses come right after Paul (the author) has spent a paragraph or so ripping on the secular/pagan world for being insensitive and profane. People who aren't tuned into what God wants tend to do stuff that God doesn't want. They just go by what makes sense to them at the time, or what feels good. In these verses, Paul's addressing some related problems in the church.
It's easy to get caught up in the emotion of the moment and deal counterproductively with people. I can't even tell you the number of times I've seen "confrontation" take place between Christians that looked more like a playground shoving match than anything else. The accuser gets caught up in the emotion of trying to correct a problem in his friend's life, and suddenly it becomes less important to solve the problem than to be the one to make the accused change.
What is unwholesome talk? It's not talking dirty or swearing. Unwholesome talk is like unwholesome food. It lacks nutrients. It causes damage to the body. No energy or health is imparted by consuming it. It may satisfy the taste and the stomach when it's eaten, but it doesn't do anything to solve the problem.
Confrontation that isn't centered in Christ's perspective and compassion is unwholesome. More often than not, it becomes caustic bullying or weak ineffective whining. Wholesome talk builds people up. It has God's surgical direction to it, addressing problems directly without becoming a power struggle or a complaint festival. Don't grieve God's Holy Spirit by throwing forgiveness in the dirt and trying to mold the world into your own image of how it should be. Your observations could be spot on, but your timing or approach could be completely off.
When you harbor bitterness or anger, you give the devil an opportunity to get your emotions all riled up where they don't belong. Your heart will drown out God's polite nudge and lead you in the wrong direction. You become a petri dish of bad cultures, and when you try to share with others, it comes out infected, and possibly even contagious. The number of times I've seen recovering alcoholics, recovering smokers, recovering fornicators, recovering crack addicts, and recovering whatevers take a bitter condemning approach to others in similar circumstances makes me confident that it's no coincidence. If you haven't made peace with a certain issue, you're not the one to be confronting others on it. If you don't even understand your own forgiveness, how are you going to dispense it effectively?
Be wholesome and good. Give out stuff that builds others up. God is so compassionate and so patient and so forgiving. We should be demonstrating that, not trying to be some kind of vigilante posse. We're ambassadors, trusted to demonstrate his kingdom, and equipped with all kinds of nourishing aid for the people we encounter.
Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.
These verses come right after Paul (the author) has spent a paragraph or so ripping on the secular/pagan world for being insensitive and profane. People who aren't tuned into what God wants tend to do stuff that God doesn't want. They just go by what makes sense to them at the time, or what feels good. In these verses, Paul's addressing some related problems in the church.
It's easy to get caught up in the emotion of the moment and deal counterproductively with people. I can't even tell you the number of times I've seen "confrontation" take place between Christians that looked more like a playground shoving match than anything else. The accuser gets caught up in the emotion of trying to correct a problem in his friend's life, and suddenly it becomes less important to solve the problem than to be the one to make the accused change.
What is unwholesome talk? It's not talking dirty or swearing. Unwholesome talk is like unwholesome food. It lacks nutrients. It causes damage to the body. No energy or health is imparted by consuming it. It may satisfy the taste and the stomach when it's eaten, but it doesn't do anything to solve the problem.
Confrontation that isn't centered in Christ's perspective and compassion is unwholesome. More often than not, it becomes caustic bullying or weak ineffective whining. Wholesome talk builds people up. It has God's surgical direction to it, addressing problems directly without becoming a power struggle or a complaint festival. Don't grieve God's Holy Spirit by throwing forgiveness in the dirt and trying to mold the world into your own image of how it should be. Your observations could be spot on, but your timing or approach could be completely off.
When you harbor bitterness or anger, you give the devil an opportunity to get your emotions all riled up where they don't belong. Your heart will drown out God's polite nudge and lead you in the wrong direction. You become a petri dish of bad cultures, and when you try to share with others, it comes out infected, and possibly even contagious. The number of times I've seen recovering alcoholics, recovering smokers, recovering fornicators, recovering crack addicts, and recovering whatevers take a bitter condemning approach to others in similar circumstances makes me confident that it's no coincidence. If you haven't made peace with a certain issue, you're not the one to be confronting others on it. If you don't even understand your own forgiveness, how are you going to dispense it effectively?
Be wholesome and good. Give out stuff that builds others up. God is so compassionate and so patient and so forgiving. We should be demonstrating that, not trying to be some kind of vigilante posse. We're ambassadors, trusted to demonstrate his kingdom, and equipped with all kinds of nourishing aid for the people we encounter.
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